The many characters of Mike

I started this post in February 2026. I got as far as the image and the title and then just left it in draft, waiting for the right words to come. I hope you enjoy them and you find some wisdom in my story that helps you with your story.

I worked out early on in life that I didn't fit into the classic people mode. When I was growing up we didn't have the understanding and the empathy we have now for differences, so I think I just accepted I was a bit odd. I was happy in my own company, liked to be in control of things and, as I've said a number of times, developed a super power that made my experience of life OK at best.

Luckily, my kind of weird is not unique and I made good friends at school, University and in my working career. We were all 'special' in different ways and accept each others weirdness.

From a work perspective, my type of weird didn't get you promoted. My tribe were ok with me but I had the habit of what could best be described as:

speaking the truth to idiots.....

They weren't really idiots to be fair. They just had a different opinion, usually based on insufficient information, and I had a talent for rubbing them up the wrong way. Most of these people were senior to me, so there were consequences.

So I decided to create some different versions of me, like characters in a play. They were all me at heart, but with stuff switched off, amped up and tweaked to suit the role that was needed to get the job done. The important thing was that I wasn't compromising my weirdness for others. Why should I ?

The good news was it worked well and I managed to get on and limit the impact my weird had on my career. The bad news was that it took a lot of effort and impacted a bit on my relationship with myself. But I didn't understand that at the time.

A moment of wise realisation

Fast forward to March 2021. It was around the time of the 20th anniversary of losing our daughter, Rachel. Vanessa was on a crafting course of some kind and I went for a walk across the Cardiff Bay Barrage. The weather was great for the time of year, the views were stunning and the memories of Rachel were beautiful and emotional. I was sitting there, taking in the view, sipping on tea and eating a pastie when it dawned on me that all those different characters I'd been playing for all those years were holding me back. They were a message to my unconscious mind that it couldn't be trusted to behave in differing circumstances, so I had to waste conscious effort keeping it under control.